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Frustration often plagues me. I'm admitting it, so there it is.
I sometimes get so frustrated with the COMPLACENCY I see all around me. There are many signs and spottings of this and they all bother me, to a greater or lesser extent. Daily, people turn their backs on others when there is an opportunity that could have been taken to help them. Daily, it makes me ache inside.
This life we have been given, was given to us to give glory to God, plain and simple.
How I wish that all would come to know Him. How I wish that all understood the concept of giving unselfishly to those who stand in need. It may only be a word of encouragement, a prayer or a word of kindness. Then again, it may cost you something. It may take your time or you may have to dig into your wallet. BUT...giving and loving others honors God. It brings Him glory when we do it for HIS glory.
Father....help me not be COMPLACENT nor judge those who display COMPLACENCY. Help me to simply be who You created me to be......a glory to Your name.
Ok.....it's been a long long time since I've blogged. My mind has deliberately not wanted to write again and I'll explain why, not that anyone particularly cares, but here it is anyway.....
If you notice, the 2nd to the last blog of mine has a picture of my precious sister Lou, standing in her doorway, waving goodbye to us as we left the last time we saw her. Not long after that, she was not able to walk anymore, so this is my last picture of her standing up. I'm being brutally honest here, brutally. Somewhere in my pea sized brain, it's been hard to post anything more cause I know that picture of her will drop further and further down the page till it cannot be seen any longer and I just haven't wanted that to happen. I know that's probably ridicously stupid, but it's true.
So there it is, the truth. I have missed blogging, the simple act of writing down what I'm feeling or thinking, not that it's important or that anyone really cares but somehow, it's important to me and I know it's important to my Jesus.
The gentle flow of the waters in a river cannot help but bring peace and calm to a persons life. How many times do we want to retreat to a peaceful place, such as a river, to try to find simple peace?
I discovered this, once again, that PEACE LIKE A RIVER can even be found in the most disheartening, difficult, desertlike places you shall ever walk. HIS peace walks amongst us, calms us and quiets us. There is not need to find a river to walk by to be calmed by the gentle rushing of the waters' flow....because....
This same peace can be found in our Savior, when and IF we will seek it. I have sought it these past few days more than I probably have in a while and I have found it. There is a quiet calm that has washed over me like a flood. The fear, anxiety, pain, hurt and confusion is gone. I can rest, I can walk, I can leave this place in peace, God's peace. When I walk in His peace, I walk with joy and without regrets.
PEACE LIKE A RIVER is found only in the glory of the Cross of Jesus Christ. Oh how I thank You God for this peace that has washed over my being.
I have no words...no words tonight that are adequate....
ONLY JESUS....ONLY JESUS.....
THIS is all I know.
As I watched her wave goodbye, my heart felt as though it sank below my knee caps. These are difficult days for her and for all of us who love her. Pat and I got into the car and waved goodbye one more time and already, I missed her.
I hurt inside and I'm not the one who has cancer. It aches Lord and I cry out to You for help, for comfort and for peace.
The love of laughter is something we all share, as well as shopping, eating chocolate, traveling and love of our children and grandchildren.
But although we are SISTERS, WE THREE, we are very different.
It is our differences that define who we are and are similarities that bind us ever closer.
After all, we are sisters. We are blood. We are united through the bond of sisterhood and no matter the circumstance, the day, the situation, it always feels good to have them near me. We share stories no one else knows, giggle about inside jokes, pinch each other when no one is looking and very likely will laugh at each other when no one else does.
We are SISTERS, WE THREE, and I am abundantly grateful that God has given me Pat and Lou to love, to pray for, to share with and enjoy. Please God, do for them what I cannot. There are needs Lord, many needs and You know what they are.
As I stood outside yesterday, gazing at the incredible beauty of this lone Japanese Flowering Tree, I was awestruck. The delicate beauty of each tiny soft pink petal left me speechless. The tree was inspiring, and its' lone beauty stood tall and almost called out to me amoung all the other lovely trees and plants in my sisters backyard. As I snapped these pictures and stood gazing at this tree and how it drew me in, I felt a "oneness" with it, if you will.
It stood tall and allowed its' beauty to be seen, quietly, gently and firmly.
I pray I am like this tree.....that the beauty of an Almighty and Perfect God draws people in as they see me. I pray that HIS beauty shines through me and invites people to "come and see" just like this wonderful tree, in its' silence, did for me.
There is much to be learned from nature. It all screams of its' Makers name.
Let my life Lord, scream of Your name and may You be glorified in it.
How can He love me?
How can He put up with my failures and faults?
How does He not get fed up with mediocrity?
What does He see in me that I cannot see?
It's UNEXPLAINABLE but....
It's undeniably true...
There is a Savior who loves me despite myself.
There is a Savior who looks over my failures and faults and sees me blameless.
There is a Savior who never gives up on my shortcomings and mediocrity.
There is a Savior who sees me as washed white, clean, forgiven, with gifts and
Talents that He entrusted just to me to use for His glory.
It's UNEXPLAINABLE...
And I am so thankful my heart runs over with a flood of tears.
I am very aware, more aware than ever, that I am a mere 3 years and 1 month away from being 60. It almost frightens me to see it in type. In my head, it cannot be possible that I could be nearing 60. But my body tells me it is true, as does my birth certificate, and so I know it's truth.
But through my church, I have had the priviledge for 16-17 years now, to work with and serve alongside our youth. THEY COMPEL ME FORWARD and give me the gusto to move forward and keep pushing, even when I don't feel like it. Seeing them in action, teaching them, watching them mature and watching them serve, gives me great purpose and joy.
Today, 7 of our precious young ladies, descended upon the home of one of our widows to serve her in whatever capacity we could to be a help. She asked us to do her windows and screens and then fed us a wonderful meal afterwards. I watched these precious young women of God jump right in and complete the task with joy. They help me remember the importance of pushing myself to spend time and effort with them. THEY are worth any effort I am able to put forward.
With humility and thankfulness, I praise our Kinsman Redeemer for allowing me the privilege of knowing and loving these girls. THEY COMPEL ME FORWARD and remind me of my responsibillity to those younger than I.
It is often difficult to think about the human heart without seeing it as the media portrays it. We view the heart as this lovely bright red painted picture, often seen with cupid arrows running through it. We tend to think of the heart with love, affection, longing and endearment. It's a symbol known across the globe as LOVE.
But, the human heart is truly not such a picture of lovliness.
Jeremiah 17:9 tells us, "The heart is deceitful above all things, and desperately wicked; Who can know it?"
Hmmmmmmmm.....makes us stop and think about our hearts, doesn't it? Deceitful and wicked above ALL things is how it is described in the Word.
Our hearts desire deceitfulness and it is a struggle within the flesh to keep the evil of our hearts at bay. Each day, one way or another, situations arise when our hearts are tested and the evil rises to the surface and rears its' ugly head. We must fight to keep our thoughts pure, our mouths quiet and our hands calm.
THE EVIL WITHIN US lies right in our own hearts. Dear God, help me to "guard my heart, above all else" as Proverbs 4:23 says for it is "the wellspring of life." EVERYTHING about me, springs forth from my heart.
"Create in me a pure heart, oh God!" Psalm 51:10
